american tourists

Recently, in a Madrid McDonalds, there was an American couple. A middle-aged snobby man with his either a) 2nd wife, or b) woman he was cheating on his wife with (younger, wearing a corset type thing, and really skinny with huge round fake boobs coming out of her neck).
They had been in Spain for three days. He was yelling/complaining in his American snooty Thurston Howell III way "oh. my. god. ughh if i have to eat one more meal with sausage or ham... i.. i.. i swear to god... i swear to god i am leaving today." But then, Boobs McGee wants her cheeseburger without onion. The person at the counter doesn't understand her, and she doesn't speak english. She starts SOBBING... DOES ANYONE SPEAK ENGLISH!?!?! ANYONE??? ANYONE???? WAHHHHH ahha hhhhh"
After finding a translater to say "sin cebolla" and Boobs stopped sobbing, the couple, apparently confusing Spain for Honduras or some other 3rd world country, gave a little girl a one dollar bill to take a picture with them. I can see it already.. "Marshall, look at this picture we took with a young child we befriended while we visited her country... isn't she just dahhhling?"
In other news, man-thongs have been spotted in the store. I guess that explains what is worn under the super-tight white pants that they like to sport.