accessorizing

This is a topic I've been wanting to tackle for quite sometime and today is the day that I will finally put it down on paper. Except minus the paper..

To begin... I realize very, VERY well that I am no fashion goddess. I mean good grief, my path to girl hood was long and is pretty embarassing to look back upon. Most people have a few blackmail photos from their childhood. Screw that buddy, I've got ALBUMS of photos. BOXES of negatives. You had an awkward year? WAH.. I had an awkward DECADE. In fact, I would just love to run for public office or date someone really famous someday just to see what photos of me get dragged into the public eye.

My "phases," because my stunning looks really did go in stages, progressed as follows. 1: Mommy dressed me in cute things until I began to refuse to wear them. 2: I spent my childhood playing tackle football in the front yard with all the neighborhood boys... therefore I was in my tomboy phase donning mesh shorts below the knees and giant t-shirts. The evolution of Betsey continues with step 3, which I like to call the "shman (she-man) lumberjack," and which reached its peak during 8th grade. This stunning era was spent in my men's Eddie Bauer flannel shirts which were worn ON TOP of overalls (very chic at the time.. according to Woodcutters Weekly Magazine) Then we move on to a crucial step 4 in high school, when I wore jeans and nice big comfy sweatshirts... the gray zip-up to be exact... those of you who have known me since before college remember that bad boy quite well I'm sure. Step 5 happened in college. One day I looked in the mirror and had a revelation. Something along the lines of 'well would you look at that... turns out that I DON'T have man parts and therefore maybe.. just maybe.. I should start trying to fit in with my fellow boob-possessing peers' (and I'm not referring to old man boobs, as tempting and physically attractive as that would be..). I highlight this Darwinian evolution of Betsey (I really should have my own chart) simply in an effort to point out that I have never nor will ever consider myself an authority figure in the realm of style and I don't typically take it upon myself to judge how others dress. Fine. Express yourself. Go to town. Change it up. Don't blend in. Be you! All that classic 'be yourself pamphlet' material.

That being said... there is a girl in our program who will remain nameless although she shall henceforth be referred to as OTT (over the top). Now I could EASILY dedicate an ENTIRE blog to the various "characters" in this program and daily stories/observations of them. They are weird... and I don't mean quirky weird, or individual-type weird, or funky weird, or 'wow she's weird, but I respect that' weird... I mean just plain WEIRD. Nuts. Wayyy out there. Beyond normal human comprehension. Believe me, I don't by any means consider myself to be "normal," but these people just shock us more with each day that we spend in class with them. OTT is a proud member of this special group of people.

Moving along. There is a lot of accessorizing going on in Spain... and I like accessorizing mainly because I'm a cheap bastard. I mean, instead of buying several shirts, I can buy one shirt, re-wear that shirt with different stuff, and spend the saved money at the bar. Or the bakery. Score! But there is a limit. And that limit is called not wearing every damned accessory under the sun at the same time... OTT evidently didn't get this memo. She's like a walking entertainment venue. Everyday we sit in class waiting for her arrival just to see what she decided to throw together... I will randomly take an outfit from a typical day:

Checkered slip-on Vans. I love them, have wanted them to come back into style for the last four years, and am contemplating buying a pair, so OTT gets two points there. Now add giant gold belt worn not where belts should be worn, but rather up around the ribs... serving some therapeutic purpose I'm sure. Weight lifting perhaps. Check. Big chunky gold earrings. Check, check. Now throw a little black J.Lo-esque hat perched on one side of her head into the mix. Check. And some necklaces. Check, check, check, check. And a big scarf. Check. And ARM-SOCKS (you know.. like gloves but with the fingers cut off in a very hip 'I want to look homeless' way). Check, check. With big chunky black and gold bracelets worn OVER the arm socks. More checks. I can't even continue... Senorita OTT, you are out of control. I mean honestly, does she look at herself in the mirror, think she looks boring, and decide the only remedy is to put everything she owns on at the same time? Isn't that what crazy old drunk ladies do? My God, I would kill to see the concoction she puts together when she gets married...

And the best part is that not only does she get fame for being OTT on a daily basis, but she's also a grade A, art class over-nodder. A double offender!